I finally changed the theme! I was sick of the stark white background and well, it was getting old to look at. Tweaked some colours here and there, and added image headers of my character Ivan, who I created in early 2003. 💜 His red hair fits the colours. I think it looks really pretty!
Dad had his first round of immunotherapy earlier this week. It took forever and he felt like he had the flu after. He wore the ‘I have rabies’ shirt to the hospital 😆 Lots of reactions lol
I stayed at the parents last night. I sat around with them and we all went to bed at 10. I laid there and listened to music, and watched cat and zit popping videos 😬 I’ll go back soon, maybe Saturday or Sunday night. Ever since the neighbours helped move a mattress to my little sleep corner, I’ve been able to sleep there. I actually enjoy being down there with my little Roku tv and being able to watch YouTube on it.
I decided I’m going to let my hair get ever-so-slightly longer. I want purple hair again, I really miss it. I got a Splat! Kit at CVS. I’m going to let it grow about 1/4 of an inch before I colour it. CVS also has that colour that you put on and shower after leaving it on for 15 minutes. I think it’s called Overtone. No bleaching required but it looks different on different colours of hair. I don’t think hot water affects it too much because that was a selling point if I remember right. No more cold showers to keep the dye looking good. It’s like one 10-15 min application every week and it supposedly stays vibrant despite using hot water. I might try it at some point. I did look at their black dye a while back and it didn’t get the best reviews. I think it might just be that it’s black. If I dye my hair black, which I have many a time, I want it to be fucking BLACK. Not a weird black-brown like the pics in the reviews. I dyed mine black a few years ago, and it faded so freaking fast. I got to witness that gross brown-black as it faded. Ugh. Dye used to last until I bleached it myself! Tf happened? I don’t understand semipermanent, just give me permanent dye like I used before, because why would I want it to fade and look like ass? It seems to be a little difficult to find at Sally’s or whatever, and I never see permanent in unnatural colours anymore.
I…I bought more collectible dolls. They’re all gorgeous and I’m so excited to get them, but I also feel ashamed because I have zero self control and I’m also extremely impulsive. If I really, really want something but can’t get it, it freakin EATS at me! There is something wrong in my head. Not sure what it is, but…something’s gone awry up there. I wasn’t like that before I started living alone. It started with buying a black satin sleep mask with “fuck off” on it. I didn’t have decent curtains in my bedroom and…it was an inexpensive and defendable purchase. That’s when I realised that I’m an adult and have free will, and that’s what kicked it off. It is so easy to look for something on Amazon or eBay and get it with the click of a button. But don’t get it twisted, I am NOT a hoarder. It’s the rush of easily being able to have these things I want so badly, the rush of having something to anticipate, and displaying them in my home and feeling happy and proud that I own them. That’s a bunch of excuses, of course. They’re also explanations and reasons. I get so much joy from this that I don’t know if I even want to fix it! Regardless, I will talk to my therapist about it just to get her insight. Maybe she can tell me why I am the way I am 😅
I really don’t want to get in debt like I was (even though it was not that much, but I don’t make a lot) so I’ve been paying extra every month on my affirm and Klarna apps. I’m paying double the monthly amount on some things to get them paid off faster. It does give me some relief mentally. And a little bit less anxiety.