I had my stomach emptying test at 8. I was made to eat some particularly bland scrambled eggs that had some kind of radioactive stuff in it. I salted the fuck out of them. The radioactive substance did absolutely nothing to spice it up, so salt it was…😬 I then went into the “radioactive donut machine” as I called it, because I couldn’t remember what it was. It’s a CT scan machine. They took a picture right after I ate. I then had to come back for four more pictures, each an hour apart. Me and Lauren went all over gods creation during the hour long breaks, I was actually very productive today! I got mom’s second Christmas gift, a smaller hydroflask. I found a lime green one in that size. She loves that colour. When I was a tween, mom and I shared a lime green skort between us. Lol. I also got myself a 42oz water bottle since the last one grew MOLD. I haven’t been drinking nearly enough water since Hurricane fucking Helene. Not being able to drink the tap water made keeping that up a little difficult and I never got a new bottle. Maybe it’ll make me feel better if I drink 42oz every day. We went to Mighty Dollar where I got gift bags and tissue paper for mom & dads Christmas presents. I even got Lucy a bag of treats and a little bag for it. Now my question is…what the fuck do I get a cat for Christmas? 😅 Maybe I’ll just give him four cans of food Christmas Day. That’s his favourite thing, anyways. He terrorises me for hours until feeding time since he can’t graze dry food all day and night.

Things took a turn for the worse today. I am in pain. Aleve doesn’t touch it or take the edge off. Lyrica seems to have quit working somehow, that has to be the problem. My left arm is doing the thing I’ve been dreading for about ten fucking years since the first time it happened. I’ve been thinking since then when I have rotator cuff pain that oh CRAP, it’s happening again! It never quite materialised but I do think this time is different. The orthopaedic surgeon said my arm was “hanging low” in the socket and I think that describes exactly how it feels! It’s starting to hurt no matter how I position it, even if I don’t let my arm hang straight down. Last time, I cried while mom was on the phone trying to get me an appointment with them but it was difficult. It took six months, and filling out a lot of paperwork. It sucked. Bigly. By the time I got to see the surgeon, the pain had faded quite a bit and I was really annoyed that they wouldn’t be able to really tell me what it was and how to prevent it from EVER happening again! That was a horrible six months, let me tell ya. I couldn’t do much of anything. Showers were an absolute nightmare. So was getting dressed. Or just existing. Everything SUCKED. Some things have happened since, such as one of my arms suddenly got fucked out of the blue. I couldn’t lift it much at all and when I tried to, the arm wouldn’t rise and I had to keep it close to my body. The forearm didn’t seem to be affected. Rotator cuff demon struck again! That happened once more. The crappy part is that I had JUST moved out and into my first apartment and I couldn’t do shit like unpacking, putting things up, or cleaning my place or MYSELF. I had to try but good lord it was a crappy situation. I told my PCP about it and she said it would straighten out in a week or so and it did, but she didn’t tell me what it was! Ahhhh. Why do they never really explain shit? When my eye went coocoo bonkers, I was told it was the eye jelly. I had a weird spot in my vision that appears to be swirling in a circle. Still do! I had to go back and have the optometrist to explain this to me in detail like I’m a damn five year old. 😅 My current doctor (actually a nurse practitioner but whatever, she’s great) explains things very clearly and in detail. Definitely appreciate her. Anyways. I caved and said I’d try my best to have the MRI without anaesthesia so I can get an appointment a lot quicker. I’ll try but I don’t know if I’ll flip my shit being in the tube. I need to be at least a bit sedated, I don’t know what to take for that! This is really gonna suck 🫣

Damn, that’s a wall of text lol

At least I’m a step closer to solving the strictured esophagus because of today’s test. It’ll still be months until I get a friggin appointment for the procedure! Definitely sometime next year. 😑 I just wanna be able to swallow like a normal person.

Dad’s biopsy got rescheduled to Monday at fricken 7am. I’m just glad he got an appointment so fast. This man knows waaay too much about livers. Mom said he was feeling on his own liver and found a big knot about few inches long 😳 I guess that’s…the tumour? Yikes! I don’t know how he feels his own organs, I don’t even know where a lot of them reside in the body 😬 If I were to try and =feel= my organs, I’d only feel fat lol

Ever since Oscar started insulin and a wet food diet, he has become more of a lap cat than he ever was before the diabetes. I’m really enjoying it. 🥹

I am soooo tired, I’ve been up for more than 24 hours. Didn’t bother with sleep last night, because reasons.