Now it’s not only the breathing but the allergies. They get worse and worse! Especially when both are happening at the same time. Torturous. I’m asking my doctor to refer me to an allergy doctor so I can have a new test and see if anything has changed in the fifteen plus years since I last had one. I’m hoping to get allergy shots like when I was a kid. Back then, I’d get at least one sinus infection per month. Always sick. I feel the same way now. 😣 The sensory problems I have amplify the awfulness by a lot. I can’t handle feeling this way. I’m actually feeling a little self-harmy. I’m sensitive and not built to handle whatever is wrong with me. I truly would rather break a few bones than suffer through this. The worst part is I don’t know if it’ll stop…
Also, some people are rude as fuck and need to learn to shut their fucking face.
Due to this health bullshit, I have exactly zero chill. None. Like I said, my nerves are rubbed raw from this experience and people just can’t take a goddam hint and leave me the fuck alone. I’m having the growing urge to slap the hell out of someone. It’s getting worse every day. I fear I might actually do it. I’m doing my best to keep my shit under control but I’m not doing a great job of it. I actually thought about checking myself into the hospital but I remembered parts of the previous time I went and decided not to. If waiting to get a room wasn’t so fucking tedious and miserable, I might actually have done it.
I don’t know what I’m gonna do now. I am so DONE with everything and everyone. This is wreaking havoc on my life. I can’t describe it or how I feel or why it’s affecting me this way. Probably has something to do with one of my greatest fears coming true…