Tag: Temu

May 04 2025 May 4, 2025 May 4, 2025 NoComment by Eden

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Breathing is stupid again, so I guess I’ll write something to calm it. 😅

Some piece of human garbage in North Carolina set an opossum on fire. I wasn’t able to watch the news story about it because I didn’t want to be really upset, but I’m really glad a case of animal cruelty made the local news. People need to see that stuff. From the very little I saw, it seemed to have something to do with Animal Control. I kind of assumed an employee might have done it. They also recorded it on their phone. People are sick fucks, I cannot imagine why they feel compelled to do shit like that. My dad knew a boy in his fourth grade class who got sent to a reform school for doing horrible things to animals. He said this kid was a budding serial killer. Sometimes he pops into my head and I hope he’s either dead or in prison. Preferably dead. You know this dude has probably killed a person somewhere along the line,  because I think if someone has impulses like that, it doesn’t magically go away once they reach adulthood. Dad told me what this kid supposedly did a long time ago and I wish he hadn’t. I’ll never get that out of my head. Anytime his name come up, I’m like “nope, don’t want to hear anything about him. Fuck that guy.”

There’s a T-shirt I want from Etsy, but I’m suspicious that the seller is reselling stuff from Temu. I found the same shirt on Temu and also on a few other Etsy sellers shops. How would I go about asking them if they’re reselling or screen printing the shirts themselves? I don’t want to be outwardly insulting even though I think selling a $6 shirt from Temu for almost $30 on Etsy is unethical as hell and a really shitty thing to do. I won’t buy shirts from Temu because everyone complains that even though they’re supposedly 100% cotton, it’s made of a weird polyester stretchy material instead. I also hear that the design doesn’t last long. It’s a really cool shirt but I need to be sure the seller is printing their own stuff or has their own manufacturer or whatever and not reselling. I’m actually not sure if mass reselling from sites like Temu is against Etsy’s rules or not. Everything is supposed to be handmade or vintage, or that’s what I understood it to be.

I have actually been able to get to sleep the last couple of mornings. The leg and foot thing are still bad, but I’ve started getting it under enough control that it doesn’t take me three or four hours to fall asleep. Restless leg was SO bad when I was at the parent’s this afternoon. I kept having to get up to do intense stretches.

Me and dad watched videos on YouTube of stupid people getting arrested. Some of it was funny, but some were just sad. I don’t understand how people get themselves into these situations. Drugs, alcohol or mental illness? A combination thereof? The times I’ve been approached by cops, I was very quiet and said yes sir or no sir. Well, except that time in high school. I was 16 and pissed off 😆 They wanted me to leave my bag in the school yard while they took me inside to accuse me of stuff I didn’t do, and I said  “No.”,  jerked my arm away, walked back across the yard and got my bag. Hey, I wasn’t gonna let anyone steal my shit! That bag had some of my precious things in it. They were coming after me because of how I dressed. 😒 They basically said that. The campus “police” didn’t like me at all 😬 lol. Looking back, I find it kinda funny but oh lordt, it sure pissed me off at the time! There was this one security guy who hated me and my friend with a passion, for no apparent reason. Once again, it was probably because of how we dressed. He’d ride his fat ass around in his little golf cart and yell shit at us from a distance. We were confused at first and didn’t know why he was acting that way, but started taunting him back after a while. We called him “Butterball”. To his face. lol. He was SO mad, the look on his face was great. Wish to god I had a picture 😆 Good memories, haha.

My breathing isn’t screwed up anymore so I’m gonna take a short nap. Not that I particularly want to, but I’m tired.


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Feb 12 2025 February 12, 2025 February 12, 2025 NoComment by Eden

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I was stressed today, so mom took me to the BBQ place and we ate river chips 😀 That usually makes me feel better. Had to take an extra Ativan anyways! I was hot and shaky and my pulse was racing. Don’t know what that was about.

I got my package from KILLSTAR today, I remember one thing that’s in it but forgot the other! Brilliant! I have yet to open it and try stuff on. I didn’t feel like it I guess. I’m really afraid the pants won’t be high waisted enough. That’s the only kind of pants I’ll wear because I’ll be DAMNED if my fat hangs over the top of my pants. Absolutely not. Gotta tuck it in. That’s also why I invested in a (shitty, I need a different one) belt.

I also got the last Temu package I ordered at the beginning of the month. I got two belts in that one as well as the “memento mori” sticker I’ve been waiting for. It’s going on my new phone case, which seems to have disappeared. Damnit. Still waiting for that replacement pop socket too. It hasn’t shipped or anything. I understand that it’s handmade but it feels like I ordered it a while ago.

http://endymion.nu is up and running! As you can see, it’s pretty ugly at the moment and has no layout. I did too much tonight and didn’t feel like making one. I uploaded all the fanlistings, installed enthusiast (all by myself!! Yay), added them all into enth, edited the config files for each one to reflect the changes and sent in thirty six moved forms. So yeah, was kind of burnt out after that. I’m going to attempt a decent one myself, but if that doesn’t go well I’m considering asking a friend if I could commission one from her. I don’t know if she takes commissions or not. One of her recent BSSM fl layouts enamoured me for some reason. Very simple and elegant. That’s what I’m going for. I wish my coding was better. I’ve been making websites for 25 years and never really learned how to code WELL. By that, I mean it’s messy and I never use headers, footers or most importantly, stylesheets. All because I’m lazy and just slap it in there. Also, stylesheets tend to confuse me just a little bit. I understand perfectly how they work, I’m just not good at making them.

I think my host is definitely mad at me; she hasn’t answered any of my emails. That really upsets me. I understand that I can be annoying but….damn. I still have to move windsprite to leprd.space. That’s where I have most of my sites hosted. It’s kind of funny, I almost never have to bother that host. Probably because I have almost complete control over my own stuff via cPanel.

Listening to: This Ascension – Mysterium


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Jan 29 2025 January 29, 2025 January 29, 2025 NoComment by Eden

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I really don’t feel good. I’ve felt kind of woozy and faint when standing up. Now I’m feeling cold-hot. I have a fan blowing on me but I feel both cold and hot. It’s very uncomfortable. I took a strenuous shower, and I say strenuous because exfoliating my scalp is a lot of work, at least to me…my arms could barely stand it. I feel like I’m hot because of that, even though I’ve been out for over an hour.

Oscar jumped in with me again. Twice. It’s become a thing. He’s gonna do it every time lol. At least he didn’t scare me this time.

I get paid tomorrow at midnight. I can make the payment to Etsy and open my shop and work on it a bit. I’ve made a couple of banners which I’m not particularly keen on. Maybe I should pay someone on Fiver to make one, I dunno. That’s some people’s specialty, definitely isn’t mine! I can also get my new domain and start working on that layout. My primary collective is the only site I won’t pay someone else to make the layout for. It kind of has to be my own. It’s usually the best I can make.

I’m going out with Bobbie at one today, we’re supposed to go to hickory and hit some thrift shops. Looking for those leather jackets again…maybe stop by Outback and get some cheese fries or something. I hope I’m feeling better by then. I don’t believe I’m getting sick or anything, this happens sometimes. Maybe I need something to eat…

Edit: YouTube is being disgusting. I keep seeing ads for an AI app for lonely perverts, with what I assume are AI generated women doing sex acts. It’s so realistic, I wouldn’t have known the difference if it wasn’t an AI app. It’s barely offscreen but you can tell they’re doing a certain uh, activity. It’s just gross, and I don’t want to see that shit when I’m watching videos. I’m not the fucking demographic you’re seeking. Ya nasty, YouTube. Ya nasty.

Otherwise, I’m feeling a lot better than I was. I ate some macaroni and I’m drinking my 62oz of water. I kind of regret the ronies because they didn’t taste that good but that’s all I really had to eat. I need to find something that’s better after I get paid.

I’ve come to the conclusion that my ring size is 12.5. That’s why the rings I order off Temu are always a little too big or a little too small. I hope my fingers go down to a better size after I lose more weight and not an in-between size like that, which no one ever carries. I got a really cool ring today in my Temu package. It’s a size 12 and it’s actually a little bigger than I expected. Twelve is usually a little tight but fits, so I guess this ring runs larger. It’s a pretty big, flashy ring with a coffin on the front that opens to reveal a skeleton. It’s wicked, I love it. I’ve gotten some great rings off that site, most of them have been pretty good quality. I got a metal wall sign with a diagram of the Lament Configuration (from the Hellraiser series, in case you’re not familiar) as it’s my favourite of the  puzzle boxes and I wanted it on my wall with my other Hellraiser stuff. It’s not as high quality as it looked in the picture, but I still like it. My wall art of the dramatic fainting possum was pretty poor quality…I was definitely disappointed but it’s still going on my wall with my other possum art. This haul was one of the lower-quality ones I’ve had. I did get my name necklace (has my name in a gothic font with a bat underneath) and the chain is a little short for my neck, as were all the necklaces in this one. I just need to buy a bunch of silver extenders. Wonder if they sell those on fucking Temu haha (just checked, they do)

I decided not to do another Temu haul video with that one because I don’t even know how to edit the first one. What would be the point lol

Listening to: The Marionettes – Ave Dementia


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Jan 28 2025 January 28, 2025 January 28, 2025 NoComment by Eden

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My pop socket didn’t come today AGAIN, but I did get two bags from Temu. They never stop coming haha. The pop socket is still in fucking Greensboro. It should be here tomorrow but then again, I said that yesterday.

I’m making an attempt to snack healthier, so I got some apple slices and caramel dip from Walmart. I know the caramel isn’t the most healthy thing but hey, it’s better than cheez its. 🤷‍♀️

I still have no clue what to do with my malfunctioning printer. Might have to drag dad over here. I seriously have no idea of what I’ve done wrong. Maybe the black ink and colour ink are switched around? I considered that last night and tried to open the bottom to switch them but it wouldn’t open. 0_o What do I do??

Listening to: Nosferatu – Darkness Brings


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Jan 25 2025 January 25, 2025 January 25, 2025 NoComment by Eden

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Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever be able to accomplish all the things I want to. There’s so many things, I don’t think I could list them all.

On a more annoying note, I got my shower caddy from Temu and had to get my money back. There were no instructions and I have fiddled with it endlessly. If there’s a way to put this thing together, I can’t find it. Colour me disappointed.

I got my Charlotte Dobre “Move in the Shadows” t shirt today! I ordered that sucker at the beginning of December and have been impatiently awaiting it. I love it, it’s HUGE. Only a 2x but big and cozy. Go watch her channel. I love Charlotte 💕

My corset came and I’m pleased with it for the most part. I do wish it would suck in my stomach more like it does my sides. It’s laced up the back, maybe I’ll have mom try to tighten it. It definitely gives me more of an hourglass figure and I can definitely believe it takes 4 inches or close to that off my waist. The Etsy store I got it from is Corsetland.

I’m apparently getting another big ole bag of Temu shit today, they never seem to stop coming haha. Don’t know if I’ll make another video for this one, I haven’t even figured out how to edit the first one!


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Jan 23 2025 January 23, 2025 January 24, 2025 NoComment by Eden

I did it

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I made the Temu haul video, all without showing my face. My phone made it hard to show it anyhow. I don’t know if I should get a tripod or something to kind of distance it from myself because you could hear everything, every fucking noise I make. Lip smacking, every breath etc. I mailed it to myself and have to edit it for YouTube. I’m going to put it on my art channel. Before I actually post any art haha. I’ll post it here when it’s done. I hope I’m not too annoying, I hope my voice isn’t stupid sounding. I thought it sounded okay. Sometimes I make stupid comments though lol. I might bleep out some of the dumb shit. I don’t know if I have the personality for YouTube honestly, I should stick to Temu hauls, gaming and art videos. Definitely not reaction stuff, oh no. I definitely don’t have the charisma. I never have that much to say to begin with as I’m a relatively quiet person. That probably doesn’t translate to YouTube well.

I had a crisis last night. All of a fucking sudden, I started thinking about what’s going to happen when mom isn’t here anymore. I was petrified. I cried and emailed her explaining what was going on. Mom is turning 75 this year!! How long do I have left with her? Women on her side of the family tend to live to their late nineties or even make it to one hundred. I hope it’s the same for her if she doesn’t get lung cancer from all the god damn smoking she does. In the email I said “and stop smoking!!!!!!!!!”. I was hoping it would trigger something in her to realise she has to quit. My friend (actually a friends mom but she was my friend as well) got lung cancer and passed away and it was just awful and sad and…I never want to see anyone else suffer like that, especially not one of my parents. I would be beyond devastated. “Emotionally Obliterated” are probably the best words to use. Smoking is a personal choice and I don’t think it should be banned or anything, I just know it hurts people and they need to know it could hurt them…and I have the right to bug her to quit because I love her. I used to smoke when I was 16/17 but quit without any problems. I just don’t know why she can’t. I’ve tried to get dad to quit too, he exclusively vaped for many years but suddenly started smoking again! Mom quit for a couple years and suddenly started back again too. I don’t understand the allure of it, sure it looks cool in photos and drawings, I’m not gonna pretend it doesn’t, but it tastes like shit! Any kind of respiratory problem scares the shit out of me so lung cancer is terrifying. I don’t know what it feels like to have it obviously but I imagine it’s awful! I don’t want anyone I love to go through it. Again.

That was a huge ramble and I don’t know if it made sense. I guess I’m still a little bit upset.

Edit: She did spend some extra time with me today. We went to Boulevard BBQ, got some river chips with ranch and talked for a while. It was pleasant. I really love my mom even if we don’t always agree. She said she was going to work on a plan for me for after she’s gone, because dad can’t deal with things the way she does and I certainly can’t. I love dad but if it was just me and him, we’d both be screwed haha. The day ended on a good note and I feel somewhat better.


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Jan 23 2025 January 23, 2025 January 23, 2025 NoComment by Eden

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I came home yesterday afternoon and was kind of sleepy but figured I couldn’t nap because of the provigil. I actually got a nap in though. I was feeling the same way the day before and there was no way to nap because I had accidentally taken the 200mg provigil. It was absolutely miserable! Being tired but sort of buzzing inside with weird energy. I have been like that for a couple of days now and I hate it so much, I don’t know why I’m suddenly feeling sleepy like that. I hope it doesn’t last. Might have to speak to the psychiatrist about that if it doesn’t stop. Also I’m questioning why I felt tired at all on the 200mg pill, that’s concerning. This medication is given to narcoleptics ffs. I wish I could get a chance to go to the cpap place and get the stupid thing fixed. They’re only in on certain days. I think wearing it would probably help a lot. It’s been a while since I’ve worn it. Months.

I snazzed up my Pinterest boards. I also archived a lot of them, I had too many. Most of them haven’t been updated in a decade or more but I plan on getting on and updating/editing them. I have had that account since 2009, thats why I was able to get the username “river”. I was watching Firefly at the time lol. Sooo much on the recipes board haha. Here it is.

I have a big ole Temu bag in my dining area, ready to be opened. I haven’t done it yet because I am itching to make that Temu haul video but can’t get up the courage! I was also happy to find that the shower caddy I ordered is finally on its way to me. I hope it’s not too small and that it will actually suction to the shower wall and not just fall off. At least I know I can “return” it if it sucks. My shower has few places to put things and I have numerous things I use. I hope it’s useful. Sometimes it’s a gamble with Temu but at least  I know I can get money back.

My parents bread maker stopped working, so OF COURSE I check fucking Temu and there are indeed bread makers on there. I’m gonna do some research on the one I’m looking at and if all seems good, refer my parents to it. I love when they make warm, fluffy, buttery bread. We make it a whole dinner, just pepperoni bread and butter. It’s delicious. The one I was looking at was about $60. Not too bad at all, if it’s any good.


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Jan 15 2025 January 15, 2025 January 15, 2025 NoComment by Eden

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Got my wig in the mail! Haven’t opened it yet, guess I’m a bit nervous. I got a massive Temu delivery, like everything came at once and I was not expecting it. I sat down and opened stuff. Thought about making a video but I was in my jammies. Excuses! I “returned” a few things because they did not fit the description on the site, or just didn’t fit period. I got a belt and when I saw it said “the fuck kind of necklace is this?” It was that big around. You would have to be maybe a size xxs to get this thing around your waist. It only came in one size. It’s a real shame, I would have loved it were it big enough. I wound up with $30+ in credit. I got some really cool stuff aside from that. I’m going to have to take a picture of all the stuff I’ve gotten so far, because it’s a LOT.

I’m trying to get my peer support to confirm whether or not she’s coming at 9:30 this morning. I texted her and had a short conversation but I can’t get her to say yes or no even though I’ve asked plainly at least twice. I love this girl but she can be a little bit hard to communicate with sometimes…

Edit: checked out the wig, he didn’t tease the sides like I asked. I’m trying to do it like he did. I decided I liked the first one better but there’s not really anything I can do about it, pretty sure he’d be super annoyed with me! I’m going to order another one from him down the road. I just have to get some of these damn affirm and Klarna plans paid off first, I can’t compound any more.

Edit 2: Amazon refunded me $12 for something I don’t remember buying. Not complaining, but…???

Listening to: Horror Vacui – In Darkness You Will Feel Alright


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Jan 11 2025 January 11, 2025 January 11, 2025 NoComment by Eden

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I got sick first thing this morning. It was disturbing. I’m not going to elaborate but I probably should have gone to the ER. 🙁

I got the ingredients for loaded fries. Steak fries, Monterey Jack (has colby in it but that’s all I can find), bacon bits, and ranch. That’ll be my unhealthy girl dinner. 😁

Edit: Currently making those cheese fries. I will take a pic if they turn out good.

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They were okay, but the cheese hardened up before I could really enjoy it. Next time I’m making a cheese sauce. 🫠

I got my VampireFreaks package yesterday and tried on my dress and fishnets and they actually fit! I’m shocked lol. It’s beautiful and more well made than I expected. I was almost certain I’d have to return or exchange something. With a corset (which has been shipped, yay), the dress will fit even better.

I finally opened all my Temu stuff and they did pretty good! Things seem to fit mostly well, except a beetlejuice sandworm necklace. It looked bigger on the page, but don’t they all. I don’t want to return it but yeah. I haven’t tried on the tights I got yet because I’m lazy. Getting that dress off myself tired me out! It was tight on the arms and that made it really difficult. I’m afraid I’ll accidentally rip it.


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Jan 10 2025 January 10, 2025 January 11, 2025 NoComment by Eden

Well, I got what I wished for…sort of

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I wished for snow and got it. Unfortunately sleet and ice came with it. Kind of ruins the magic, ya know? I’m praying to whatever gods I can think of that my power doesn’t go out. I had to have my uncle drive me home in his big ass truck because I got stranded at my parents. 😅 Thanks, uncle!

Lordy I got sooo much Temu shit in the mail today, as well as some Etsy stuff and my clothes from VampireFreaks! It all decided to come at once when I was expecting one coat from Etsy and one package from Temu. I have a literal pile. I’m still mulling over doing a Temu haul video. Don’t know if I should. I guess I can blur out my face haha. Should I? I don’t have a balaclava so I can’t do the balaclava-sunglasses thing like I was considering. I just don’t want people seeing my face yet.

Edit at 1am: the fucking snow and ice have finally stopped and my power didn’t go out 👍 I hope mom can get over here today.

I should also mention that the scale at my parent’s house says I’ve lost six pounds.

Listening to: Nosferatu – The Wiccaman


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