I’ve been having odd visual hallucinations. I was at Longhorn yesterday and they have a large fake bulls head on the wall over the bar. I looked at it and its mouth started opening and closing 😳 I know it wasn’t real but….wtf? I haven’t had this type of hallucination since I lived with my parents. Back then, I was seeing creatures on my bedroom ceiling. They were invisible yet visible, kind of like the alien in the movie Predator, when he went invisible. I posted on Facebook and one friend called them “ceiling fuckers” lolll That did make feel better because some of my friends were ganging up on the ceiling fuckers and calling them names and shit. Made the experience funny instead of scary! I know the things I sometimes see are not real. I started seeing these things in early 2005 at age nineteen, after I think I might have had some kind of stroke, or something in my brain malfunctioned. I don’t know what happened but it still affects me twenty years later. I don’t know if I ever wrote about it here. I’m not gonna go there right now lol. long story.
I’ve been filling my pillbox with Lauren’s help every Wednesday. That’s something mom always did. I was scared I’d fuck up, which is fairly likely, and have negative consequences. I just started doing it when Lauren became my peer support a few weeks ago. The people at ACA are now working to make me more independent and not depend on mom so much. I’m also learning to use the washer and dryer. There’s a number of buttons which intimidated me, but you only need to use a few. I still don’t know how to sort colours properly but I’m sure we’ll get to that soon. I bought a jug of Woolite Dark because all my clothes are black haha. I had a pair of pants way back when, black skinny jeans. After a few years of washing they turned navy fucking blue! I also have an olllllld shirt that is almost faded to grey and doesn’t match my pants, which drives me bonkers. I usually wear black head to toe. Gotta match, y’know?
I did however get a Jason shirt which isn’t black, but it was so freaking cool I had to have it!
My credit is 740 now 😸 it rebounded from that big drop! I’m really proud of having good credit, makes me feel like I’ve done something 😆