Ugh…I have a two consecutive days with two appointments each day. It just came together that way. I’m already a little overwhelmed thinking about it, especially since one of them is at 9am. I think I wrote a while back about why I hate early mornings. I have an appointment with my therapist too. I don’t really know what to talk to her about since she didn’t seem to understand last time. Although I haven’t had much anxiety at all (Thank you Lord) since I got my sign from God, I still have other problems, you know? I haven’t felt suicidal or anything since. I hope that stays in the past as well. I guess I really want to talk about things like motivation, being more independent from mom, getting a car and getting over my paranoia about driving, etc. I also need to ask her questions about emotional support animals and the laws surrounding them.
I have another inspection on Wednesday I think. One of the Section 8 guys is coming. I kind of want Mr Scaredy Cat, because him being afraid of Oscar was hilarious, I kind of want to see that reaction again 😂 Is that mean of me? Lol. I also kind of hope the other guy comes because he was interested about the things I have in my home and we had a decent conversation. Unfortunately, it’s in the early morning and I have to be up, I guess so Oscar can’t viciously maul anyone and eat their eyeballs from their sockets 😆
Speaking of cats, there’s a girl I found on YouTube who works at a big cat sanctuary and she just casually boops their noses (danger boops, as she calls them) and just rubs them and interacts with these huge animals like they’re ordinary house cats. To be fair, that’s kind of how they act! Big house cats! I know they’re wild animals at heart and I have no idea if they were born and raised in captivity or not. Sometimes I worry she’s gonna get ripped to shreds but at the same time I’m insanely jealous! I always wanted to chill with animals like that. Make a deep connection and be their “friend”, or the animal equivalent to a friend anyhow. Big cats especially. I would love to hang with a serval or a lynx, maybe even a puma. Then maybe I’d try lions and tigers 😂 I heard cheetahs take very well to humans if raised and cared for properly in a sanctuary. I saw a video on KodKods, which are a species of cat from South America, in Chile I think. They’re one of the smallest cats in the world. They are precious and adorable but a lot of people have a bad opinion of them and see them as pests ☹️ Look up KodKod on YouTube and see how cute they are. I think the smallest cat in the world is the Israeli Sand Cat which lives in the desert, but I could be wrong. They are super cute as well.
I got my “I need about tree fiddy” shirt, and I think my Return of the Living Dead shirt came today but I haven’t opened it yet.
I wish I could watch a movie but I’d definitely fall asleep. I’m asking for the Provigil again or something like it. This is stupid! 😑 The only thing Vyvance (I am certainly still spelling that wrong) does is stop me from passing out every time I ride in a car, which is great but I need more! I come home every day, watch maybe one hour long show, then I must take a stupidly long nap which kind of ruins my night. If I try to get up before it’s “completed”, I feel crappy and have to lie back down and nap more. I can’t take short naps for some reason, it has to be an entire rest. Other than that, when I go to bed at 6am, I don’t sleep any longer than most people do. I get about 7 hours or a bit less. Tired of people conflating sleeping a normal amount of time during the morning and early afternoon with laziness. Sorry, I feel like I have to say that every time I mention my sleep schedule, because people are such stuffy assholes. Some people need to realise that others being on different schedules than they are is a thing! Ahem. Tangent detected. I’ll stop now 🥴
Well…my breathing has calmed as much as it’s going to. I don’t think I have anything else to say 😅